There's no denying it: Getting over a breakup can be one of the most difficult, heart-wrenching things you'll ever have to do. One of the things that keeps men from moving on after a relationship has ended is holding on to false hope. Some men are stuck in limbo with the idea that there might be a chance of getting back together with their exes.
The result of such a belief is a double-edged rejection sword. First comes the initial sting originating from the breakup itself; then comes the heartbreaking hope that she will return; then comes the eventual realization that she doesn't regret leaving you and that she is gone for good.
All this pain could be kept short and sweet and you can recover from a breakup quickly if you learn to accept the decision made by your ex. By waiting around and hoping, any man is trapping himself in an endless circle of torture.
So, to get yourself out of this cycle and recover from a breakup quickly, follow these tips we've compiled to help you on your journey.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself
Over the years, men have earned the reputation of being big babies because they're always feeling sorry for themselves. Being dumped only adds to this.
Every man thinks his breakup is the most traumatic one in history. The truth of the matter is that breakups always follow the same pattern, and life goes on. If you keep thinking about how badly you've been hurt, you will continue to hurt. To recover from a breakup quickly, stop feeling sorry for yourself and be determined and proactive in helping yourself get over her.
Destroy the past
As I mentioned before, many dumped men remain trapped in a limbo state of mind, hoping that their ex will return to them, but they will never admit to this. In front of their buddies, they claim to be over the breakup and swear that their girlfriend no longer means anything to them, but if you ask them to throw away all the love letters and pictures, they'll refuse. Why? In case she does return, they won't have to start a whole new photo collection.
To recover from a breakup quickly, you need to destroy or burn anything that reminds you of her. If you find it difficult, this means that you can't let go and you're still hoping for her to return to you. Believe me, once you meet another woman, all those pictures of your ex will become meaningless.
Initially it will be difficult, but once you've destroyed all the memorabilia of your ex, you'll have no choice but to move on, and you won't have anything around to remind you of her and cause you to feel sorry for yourself.
Rearranging the furniture around the house helps you recover from a breakup quickly also. This will lend a new feel to the rooms, especially the bedroom, and can help you forget old memories and build new ones.
Remember your family and friends
A man can sometimes fall victim to his blind love and spend too much time with his woman, leading him to forget his family. In the end, however, once he's been dumped, he soon realizes the importance of his family and friends.
Spending quality time with your blood, the people who stick with you through tough times, is a sure way to recover from a breakup quickly. It will serve as a reminder of who you were before your relationship started, and the people who love you most will encourage and help you to get back on your feet, which is exactly the kind of push you need in a situation like this.
Repair your ego
Your ego just took a heavy blow, so the last thing you want is to get back into the dating scene and suffer the consequences of the rejection that comes from dating, you'll take it too personally.
The solution to repairing your ego is to start off slowly by first making friends and doing fun activities such as sports, dance lessons and training at the gym. Getting your body in shape will eventually give you the confidence to meet new women and rebuild your ego.
Once you feel comfortable and decide to get back into the dating game, it will be a lot easier to meet women since you have planted some seeds and you won't look as desperate.
Get motivated
Some men have bitter feelings toward their ex-girlfriends. Some behave in violent and crazy ways, while others let their performance level take a downward fall, be it in school or at work. However, you shouldn't let the actions of a woman dictate the way the rest of your life will turn out.
The sweetest revenge one could have is to be successful. Being dumped is actually the best motivation to help push you to succeed in life. There is no better feeling than bumping into your ex four years down the road after you've dropped 20 pounds, put on a rock-hard six-pack, and started your own lucrative business -- not to mention a beautiful Swedish wife standing by your side.
You won't have to worry about hiding the fact that you work for a local McDonald's. Instead, when your ex asks you what you've done with your life, you can start off with a big smile on your face, look at her wife-abusing husband and the rest is history.
Assalamualaikum wr wb,
Dear Tun Mahathir,
I think you under-estimate the will of the Rakyat to dismantle racialism. In this era of global competition and high technology - for how long can UMNO shield the Malays from the reality of a free market ?
You cannot hide the shortcomings of the Malays. No one stops the Malays from acquiring technology. You yourself sent thousands of Malays to study overseas. Yet where are the returns on your investment in them ?
Think of Proton - shouldn't your Malay engineers work double hard to improve their products like the Japanese ? Malaysia has lots of flora and fauna. Shouldn't the Malays dive into Biotechnology on account of Malaysia's flora and fauna ? Yet where are the Malay scientists etc ? For how long can you evade the shortcomings of the Malays ?
You see - Malaysia is not unique in this matter. The whole Muslim world faces the same problem. Muslims simply do NOT do enough to chase after and acquire technology ! Indeed - there are no industrialized Muslim countries except possibly - Malaysia !!
The NEP and Ketuanan Melayu has been around a long time. The Malays should have used the opportunity they had wisely. Sadly - your own UMNO abused it ! Now the Rakyat wants an end to racialism.
So yes - you are right. The Malaysian Malay is going to suffer because they no longer have the crutch. But thats Malaysia's problem.
What I hope is that you and other Malaysian politicians had better not demonise Singapore in the process. You and others better not look down on Singapore Malays.
We Singapore Malays can hold our head high and proudly so. Because we achieve on merit and not quota. Its a real achievement.
Well - its your country and not mine. I think that you first have to deal with the reality of Pakatan Rakyat.....
Best Regards
Dr Syed Alwi Ahmad